::Gulp::

That was me swallowing my first two clomid tablets for this month. Interestingly, Walmart accidentally put 20 clomid pills in my prescription container instead of 10. I hope I won't need the $18 in savings.

My Teeth Hurt

This has been going on for at least a year now. It freaking sucks & I am getting sick of it. My middle-upper molars hurt sooooo badly when I bite down. And, for some reason, fruit-flavored things make it worse. I just ate some cherry-flavored jello and now my teeth are killing me. Sometimes it hurts so much I get goosebumps, and I often can only chew on one side of my mouth, or, if both sides are hurting, I can only use my front teeth!

The past few weeks, I have been trying to figure out why the hell this is happening, and what can be done about it. My dentist told me it's because I have exposed dentin due to years of grinding my teeth at night. However, I've been wearing a mouth guard for 5 years, so the damage shouldn't have continued past that point - why would this pain have started only a year ago? She gave me a fluoride rinse that helps, but it makes my teeth very yellow, so I'm not a big fan.

So, I am wondering if it could be caused by a combo of exposed dentin and chronic sinusitis. I remember that, after my last sinus surgery, the sensitivity was horrible for a week. I could only chew with my front teeth. And I've read some stuff online about sinusitis causing tooth sensitivity. Also, my dentist did mention part of my grinding is likely caused by me trying to relieve the sinus pressure.

Anyway, I guess this is a just a vent post. I don't think there is much I can do other than keep using the mouthwash and deal with the vanity issues. I'm just wondering if this is another thing I can add to the list of "unexpected annoying things that CF causes."

CD1!

CD1 is here. Thank you Lord! The past six weeks have just sucked. I can't stand just waiting around to actually do something. Even though we still TTC'd on our own last cycle, I have given up hoping it will work that way, so I felt like we were just waiting. And that made me feel helpless and depressed. I want to be pregnant again SO BADLY.

I called the RE's office this morning, and I start 100mg of Clomid on CD5, and go in for my first ultrasound on CD13. I am so relieved to be back in the game!

Back From Vacation (Updated)

Bah! I accidentally posted this before I was done writing it! How embarrassing. So, for those of you who read my incomplete post, I've edited it and added pictures now ;)

Our vacation in Wyoming was wonderful. It was great to get away. My heart felt lighter. No obsessing over TTC. The sadness went away. Greg and I had a great time together. The weather kind-of sucked - it rained on & off every single day. But that didn't stop us from hiking 35-40 miles. I have a new love for our rain gear!

We flew into Jackson Hole on Friday evening. We stayed at an adorable bed and breakfast and had a great dinner at a local restaurant. The next day we headed up to Yellowstone. Yellowstone is so beautiful, and has so much variety! The thermal areas, the canyons, the waterfalls, the valleys, the mountains, the animals. Two days in Yellowstone was not nearly enough to experience it all.

We spent most of the first day in the Old Faithful area, checking out the hot springs and geysers - SO COOL. Here are a few pictures:

Old Faithful

Morning Glory Hot Spring

After a night of camping, we drove around the park and did lots of little hikes at a pretty darn fast pace. We saw Mammoth Hot Springs, Tower Falls, the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone, Hayden Valley, the Mud Volcano/mudpots, and Yellowstone Lake. We hiked over 10 miles that day. Our favorite hike was a little trek up a Elephant Back mountain, where we got great views of Yellowstone Lake and the Tetons.

Mammoth Hot Spring

The Grand Canyon of Yellowstone

Hayden Valley

Mudpot

Yellowstone Lake (OMG! The Sun is Out!)

The next day we headed down to Grand Teton National Park. Unfortunately, most of the park required ice axes and cramp-ons to hike - something Greg and I aren't experienced with - so we hiked throw some meadows around the base of the mountain. We found a beautiful campsite on the lake that evening.

View From Our Campsite

Awesome Sunset

On our fourth day, we hiked Cascade Canyon - it was awesome and the highlight of our trip. I almost walked right into a porcupine at one point! It was in the middle of the trail, right around a bend. I gasped and he fluffed out his quills. Then he turned around and waddled away. Misadventure averted!

Here are a few pictures from the hike:

View From the Floor of Cascade Canyon, Looking Up


Mountain Pond in Cascade Canyon

That evening we stayed and dined at the Jackson Lake Lodge. The lodge was beautiful with an amazing view of the Tetons, and the food was awesome. The perfect anniversary celebration and end to our trip. We were so sad to leave the next day!

Happy Hour on the Deck at Jackson Lake Lodge

Sunset from the Lodge

What is up with my chart?

Ok, seeing as I have a few minutes to kill before we leave, I figured I'd blog about my bizarre chart. Usually, when I get a temp shift, it is very sudden and obvious. Not this month. My temp has been gradually increasing. Also, I got my first CBEFM peak the day before I got my first positive OPK. And, I've gotten FIVE positive OPKs in a row! (And they are definitely positive.) The only explanation I have is my body had trouble Oing this month & I had two overlapping surges. I think I finally have O'd because I am starving like I always am after O, but I'm not quite sure what day it happened. I'm guessing CD 17.

This would not be a big deal except that I want to visit my parents in Maine before they sell their house on July 14th (the house I grew up in ::sniff sniff::). But, now I don't think I will be able to go because my next IUI could be anytime between the 2nd and the 11th - thanks to an unknown O date and a varying luteal phase. Boo.

(Oh, and if anyone wants to see it, my chart is here.)

Vacation Starts Today!

We are flying to Jackson Hole today. Whoohooo! I'll post pictures when we get back!

One Year

I just realized that yesterday marked our one-year anniversary of our first TTC cycle. So, I guess we officially conform to the standard definition of infertility.

Hitting this one-year mark doesn’t really bother me, but it does cause me to reflect on where I was last year (and giggle a bit at my naiveté). I thought someone who had been TTC for 8 months had been trying for a long time. Now I look at people who have been TTC for 2+ years as being in that category. I was terrified about the idea of undergoing fertility treatments. Now I am thankful for them. Even though I knew I’d likely have CM issues, I thought we’d be PG in four cycles. Now I am hoping to be PG in four IUI cycles.

I have learned sooooo much about infertility and getting pregnant, and I have learned about how much misinformation and ignorance there is out there. Yet, I am still new to this world and have so much more to learn.

I had no idea what a wonderful community of women I would meet along this journey. The original intent of my blog was to share information about CF. It was supposed to be a CF blog. I had no idea it would turn into an infertility blog. But, that change in course has led me to “meet” so many great people. I love that my blog has allowed me to connect with others struggling with IF, both CFers and non-CFers.

I can honestly say that, once we finally are pregnant (for more than a few weeks) I will be so thankful for this experience because of everything I have learned and the wonderful people I’ve met.

And, I don’t think I will ever again randomly ask a couple “so, when are you having kids?” because now I know how painful that question can be.

Yay for O!

It looks like I am about to ovulate. I got some EWCM last night, and a peak on my CBEFM this morning. Whooohooo. I think I should be ovulating today, which would mostly likely put IUI #4 right around the 4th of July.

Well, That Sucked

Greg and I went to a party last night. There were about 20 couples there: three were sporting pregnant bellies, another three had newborns, and about ten had children under the age of three. This did not put me in a good mood, and, as I didn't really know anyone, I became very anti-social and sat in the corner with the one couple I knew. They are in their 40s and do not have children. However, the guy would not stop commenting, "Everyone has kids!" "Look at all the pregnant bellies!" "That girl looks like she is about to pop!" "That baby is so cute!"

I thought my head was going to explode, so after about an hour of this torture, I had to grab Greg and ask if we could please leave. He was super sweet and obliged. I cried a bit in the car - the first time I have in about two weeks, although I have come close several times.

I hate crying because it jacks up my sinuses. The crying, combined with high mold counts and me slacking on my sinus rinses, caused me to wake up with horrendous night sweats last night. I had to change all of my clothes and move to a different spot in the bed because everything was so soaked (thank goodness we have a king-size bed). Fun times.

Luckily, I am in a much better mood today.

Zit

I have a zit on my chin. It is a gianormous zit. And it is taking forever to fade away.

I never get zits, thanks to good genes and religious use of salicylic acid and retinol. However, the day I got my BFP, I had to cease my zit-preventing regimen (because both products aren’t recommended during pregnancy). That, combined with the rush of pregnancy hormones, brought on what my friends decided to call “Mini Kristen."

When I look in the mirror, I just want to yell at my face “Come on! It’s been four weeks! Don’t you think enough is enough? My heart is already hurting, must you hurt my vanity as well?” Under normal circumstances, this zit would annoy me. But, given this zit’s history, I am downright ticked off.

I mean, WTF. Who has a zit for a month? It is starting to fade, but I feel like I am being mocked every time I look in the mirror.

I Wonder When I Will Ovulate?

This is my current TTC question. Since going off birth control, I have O'd 13 times, each time between CDs 13 and 18. I'm think I'm pretty lucky to have such regular cycles. I am curious to see if the chemical pregnancy will throw-off my luck. Hopfully it won't. The sooner I O, the sooner our next IUI cycle will arrive. But, no sign of O so far. It's CD12, and I've had no EWCM, no fertile cervix, and no high or peak readings on the CBEFM. Usually I've at least had some EWCM by now.

Nothing to do but wait. What else is new in the TTC world?